Christmas with my Girls

Christmas with my Girls,

            Ok, so I sometimes like to think of myself as an ol fart. Hey it comes in handy when I do something stupid but it’s also nice when it comes to memories.  So here is another one, the last one gave me a warm fuzzy so I figured I would try for two.  The perception I have received from sobriety is a great gift from my God.

            Now, my wife and I are separated, divorcing and whenever I look on the news all I seem to hear about are horror stories from quote “Broken homes” unquote.  So, naturally being born to worry and fret, I have always been concerned about the effect this has on our daughters.  Having one teenager, and one almost teenager, it seems sometimes the most I can get answer wise, is “I’m fine”, “school was good” and my favorite “whatever”. The one syllable burp type thing.  With my oldest daughter, I was always worried about what the world would do to her when she got out in it. With my youngest daughter, (who seems to follow after her papa in the emotional, mental way) I was always little scared for the world about what she was going to do to it.  Well I am going to share a memory that kind of put all that worry to rest, the whole ball of it kind of slipped away.  It is a Christmas memory and I love Christmas.

            One day, on a weekend I think, for it was in the afternoon, I took my daughters onto post to do some Christmas shopping at the Post Exchange.  This was a year or so after my wife and I had separated, and after my recovery from my car accident. Two rather big and traumatic events in their lives, (mine also lol), so I was hoping to make this a kind of stress free, relaxing Christmas. Now, I have not had a lot of those, there always seems to be the money worries, the “did I get the right present” worry, did I get them too much? Not enough? Any parent I think understands those worries. I never care what I get for Christmas, for me it has always been about the gift of Love, and the giving not receiving, but I (like any father) wants to do the best I can at this time of year. So the gift I got just stunned me silent, making me wish I could hold time in my hand to cherish that particular moment forever.  As we walked past the first or second isle in the store, an elderly man was walking past us, his hand-held shopping basket kind of full. As he past me, something fell out of his basket, and as is my normal way of it, I started to turn around to pick it up for him.  As I turned around, I saw my daughters, both of them, reaching for the item and returning it to him, nicely, politely and courteously, like it was the normal, right thing to do.  At that moment, in that instant, God let me know I had nothing to worry about when it came to my daughters.  If they could at that time, full of the shopping Christmas spirit, in the ready to shop mode…. just stop and do the naturally decent correct thing, then I had nothing to worry about.  It was one of the best Christmas presents I can remember.  It seems that my ex wife and I are (have to add with a little of God’s help) raising two rather nice, pleasant, well adjusted daughters who, when I talk about them, I imagine a little of the pride and love seeps out… embarrasses them I think, I get a lot of the “oh Papa” comments from both of them. Kind of puts the lesson of “no greater love than from a parent to their child” or in the blessings I receive from my God, in sobriety, to not only see, but recognize and remember.   Now I never mentioned this memory to my daughters, I doubt they would remember for it was just a normal type thing to do and that’s what makes it so special a memory to me.

            Ah, the joys of memories, guess next time I should make it a bitter sweet one…have couple of those too..lol… such is the nature of Life.