I was wondering this morning.....

I was wondering this morning as I was having my morning coffee and reading my emails etc... "What am I suppose to be doing?"  Not the getting ready for work type thing, but the in Life type thing.  One thing I realized is that: it is at least a 3 cup of coffee question.  I am currently on my second cup of coffee, at work, still pondering this question.  Every morning I start the day in reflection, (not too seriously, still having morning coffee and waking up) and have done so for over 22 years, no matter where I have been.  Just a way to get my feet on the ground of reality, and not in the world of : "I wonder if?" Normally I start with my 24 Hour a Day reflection's and reflect on that, along with something I picked up, must be over 8 years ago,  a little card that asks me: "What does my God ask of me?.... to love tenderly, to act justly, and to walk humbly with my God"  (yes, it is a quote from the Bible, a cookie to whoever gets it right) And that gets me to thinking:  to love tenderly, what is love then? I have spent many hours, days, weeks, months, and years trying to figure that out.  The best I can come up with is concern for the well being of another, that desire to see and pray for the best for them, the willingness to step out of my comfort zone to be of help to them.  One of the truest ways I can define love is when I say the word love in my mind, whose names and faces come to be pictured in my mind.  And with those names and faces comes the stillness and warmth of the soul that I can only describe as being love.   Tenderly to me means the affect I have on them in our crossing paths.  When my youngest daughter was born and I held her (the first one to hold her I might add, lol) The feeling I had and what filled the room I could only describe as God's Love.  The feeling of safety and warmth, and the soft caress of his touch on my soul as if to say: "This is my child; care for her well". So that is what I must practise, to love tenderly, all of those whose path I cross.  To Act Justly:  what are my actions today?  Am I being self centered and only out for myself? Or am I trying to be considerate of those around me?  If i ask you "how are you doing?" do I take the time to really listen to the answer? Justly to me means there is more than black and white.  To take the time to consider where the person is coming from and to put myself in their shoes.  Just because I am right does not make it ok for me to be an asshole. (something I have done before, and will probably do again) I do not need do beat anyone over the head with the I was Right stick. Compassion not sympathy should be my watch word in this. And if I practise this then I think I am walking humbly with this God of my understanding.  It is nice to know that when I get tired or am getting close to stumbling or walking off the path, that his gentle hands will guide me and give me strength.
     So how does this pertain to "What am I suppose to be doing?" Well they are my guide posts when I think about making changes or taking actions.  The actions may be self motivated, but that does not mean they are bad, it might mean that by doing so I put myself in a better position to be of use to others. On the other hand it might just be an ego feeding type thing as in look at me.... look what I did... which would be bad for whenever I use the words what I have done it means I am walking alone and not humbly with the God of my understanding and am taking credit for his results.  Not a good thing as Life as taught me.  So this is my babbling for the day so far.. I am pretty sure more will come as I drink more coffee...